Couldn't Kolluri come up with a quick trip?

Not to take away from Transportation Commissioner Kris Kolluri's "Day as a Governor," but wouldn't it have been fun -- well, except for the state Legislature -- if he decided to take a quick out-of-state trip this week?

On Thursday, the governor, the Senate president, the Assembly speaker and the attorney general were all out of town, giving Kolluri his 24 hours as New Jersey governor. (Wonder if he threw a party at Drumthwacket -- didn't Joe Roberts do that once during a mini governorship?)

Now, if Kolluri, the last in line for the spot, happened to be out of town too, the Legislature would be required to convene to appoint a governor. That would have been priceless.

This is my last blog of 2006. Happy New Year, everybody.

Should I stay or should I go now?

Recent shootings in Long Branch, Neptune and Asbury Park has prompted discussions about guns, drugs and gangs, none of which end at the borders of those municipalities. I've been involved in a few conversations about what effect this has, particularly in Asbury's case, on businesses and real estate redevelopment. Are people nervous about going into Asbury?

My husband and I went to the Market in the Middle restaurant for our anniversary this summer, and we strolled around Cookman Avenue that night, checking out the new businesses, the new townhouses going up, the very cool-looking apartments. We spoke about coming back and checking out the other restaurants, although our calendar, and our budget, haven't allowed that.

Would the shootings keep us from returning? I don't think so. But we all waffle a little bit. I know people who absolutely don't want to go into Asbury right now, others who say they have no problems with the city but might think twice if they were taking their kids, and others who say any violence is the "gang-on-gang" type or drug related, and if you're out shopping or dining, you've got nothing to worry about.

If the violence continues, can Asbury be fully revitalized?

There it goes, Miss America's former home

State Sen. William L. Gormley, R-Atlantic, wants to gut Atlantic City's Boardwalk Hall to house a $3 billion retail mall and hotel casino. The aim is to lure mogul Steve Wynn back to New Jersey.

Gormley says he wants to see the facade of the historic building retained, then use its shell to house a mall similar to Union Station in Washington, then attach a casino hotel. I honestly don't know ... I'm not a big Atlantic City person. Haven't been there in years. But after seeing so many historic homes, buildings and the like go to pot in our area, I'm always wary of any plans to "gut" historic buildings.

I think of the Asbury Park boardwalk, some incredible homes that were reduced to sticks and of our editorial board's walk-through of the buildings of Fort Hancock at Sandy Hook. The once-grand "Officers' Club" was pretty incredible -- this once fancy-schmancy place just ravaged by the elements as it was left unprotected for so long. Being inside was eerie.

Can history be preserved in Atlantic City if Boardwalk Hall is gutted? Is a retail mall the best use for this place? Does A.C. need another casino/hotel? If not, what should be done with it?

Who needs a weapon when you've got a purse?

There's a news brief in today's paper that describes three women who bagged a fleeing fugitive. Literally. Seems a man wanted for possession of a weapon and assault on police officers was being chased across a bridge in England when three women, armed only with their purses, cornered him, smacked him around, then forced him into the arms of a nearby van driver who held him until police arrived. It was caught on closed-circuit TV - I've got to see this.

It reminded me of the "car wreck" tape. Over the summer, my sister in Georgia called up, saying "You HAVE to listen to this tape." I went onto her radio station's Web site and was able to listen to a tape of a guy who was driving in Texas, talking on his cell phone and leaving a message for a friend of his when he witnesses an accident. Seems another guy ran a red light, hit an Impala with four elderly women in it and, when he acted like it was their fault, they proceeded to beat the pants off him with their purses and umbrellas.

Listening to the guy describing it on his cell phone was absolutely hilarious. Friends and I have tried to figure out if it was a fake -- but this guy's laughter is so funny, and so genuine sounding, I don't think so. I'm sure it's available in several places on the net, but I found it on this Georgia station's site: www.star94.com ... go to the audio archive of the Steve & Vicki show. It ran in late July and was labeled "car wreck." I still listen to it when I need a good laugh.

A 100-year-old lecture on nagging

I've had the pleasure of going through our archives -- I blogged about some great stuff I found on the Sea Bright-Highlands bridge last week. But the headline on the women's advice column from Feb. 4, 1907, really caught my eye: "Managing a Man; Good Advice About Nagging, Even Though it Be Hard to Follow."
It opens: "The best time not to nag a man is when he's down -- when he's suffering from the consequences of his own fault. Let him alone then if you never do again. Do not be afraid that he is not aware of his sins. He probably is. He probably has not an excuse in his own mind for his conduct, but if you begin to nag him all his human nature will rise in rebellion against the implied 'I am better than thou,' and he will justify himself, even though it be silently." It was credited as coming from the Philadelphia Press.

After cracking up at the headline, I have to admit the advice still sticks, but more as a way of treating each other, not how to delay a good nagging session. Don't kick somebody when they're down. How often have we heard that?

The advice continues to instead help someone when he is down, "not with ostentatious virtue, but try some sensible, practical aid to getting out of the trouble he has brought on himself. Don't act holy yourself, but lend a hand. Then, when the trouble is all over, don't rub it into him. More than likely he will confess to having been a beast."

Yes, we know when we screw up, and nothing hurts more than having it rubbed in our faces. And we also know how tempting it is when someone else has screwed up to lecture about it ad nauseam. The advice ends with:

"Your attempt to coerce a man and to drive him down some road of your making will surely wreck the cart. No individual has a right to attempt the control of another. Strew your own road with flowers of kindness and courage and the weary traveler will wish to walk therein with you."

Not bad advice, 100 years later.

Label me techno-inept

I took a few days off to get ready for the holidays. One of my goals was to get all my holiday cards out. Our old computer had a printing program that I typed our whole address book into. All I had to do was call up the list and hit print. Ta-da! Envelopes labeled and stamped in no time at all. I loved it, and with all there is to do at the holidays, not having to write out 50 or so envelopes is a welcome break. But .... New computer. Old one's long gone. So I picked up some new printing software. I followed all the directions. I typed in, one by one, all our addresses, knowing it would be so much easier from here on out.

When I went to print it out, it didn't work. "Help" told me that when I hit "print" I'd get the "print labels" menu. I didn't. I spent two hours troubleshooting, trying to find help on the company's Web site. Finally, I tried to e-mail the software maker, but it wouldn't let me access its tech support because I couldn't figure out how to determine exactly how much RAM was on my computer, or something like that, and what video card I have, or something like that.

I then decided to borrow my parents' print software. I loaded it up and spent another hour trying to figure out how to make individual labels instead of pages of a single label. Finally, at 11 at night, I gave up. I had our return address on labels, but stayed up for the next hour and a half addressing the envelopes. My other goal -- to wrap presents while the kids were in school -- will probably be done about 11 at night Christmas Eve. Again.

Serious use for a silly product

How innovative are U.S. soldiers? They came up with the idea of using Silly String to protect themselves from bombs. They squirt the goop across a room before searching it. It solidifies into the stringlike stuff in the air. If the stuff remains suspended, it shows them where a nearly invisible trip wire is. How cool is that?

A Camden County mother heard about it from her son, and she's been collecting the stuff. With 3,000 cans of it in her garage, she could be drawing some strange looks from unaware neighbors. The Michigan company that manufactures the similar Magic String just donated another 6,000 cans to her cause.

What a great idea. But a news story about it said "the military is reluctant to talk about the use of Silly String, saying that discussing specific tactics will tip off insurgents." ... Probably because they didn't think it up themselves, or aren't funding it.

De-fenceless against terrorists

If terrorists decided they wanted to do something evil with the 90-ton chemical tankers on the side of the Turnpike, do you think they'd turn around and give up when they saw there was a fence? The New Jersey Turnpike Authority does. It voted to spend $6 million to put up a 10-foot fence between Linden and Newark.

Pretty lucrative for the fence guy, I'm sure. A fence, for crying out loud. And 10-feet tall? Why bother? Homeland security is too important to be looking for ways to spend money ... remember the air-conditioned garbage trucks Newark bought with Homeland Security funds?

And what's with a fence? Who's getting these fence contracts? Whenever I get onto Route 18 northbound from Route 138 eastbound in Wall, I drive past a lovely white fence that provides a barrier between the off-ramp and ... What? I don't know ... there don't appear to be any homes immediately on the other side. And if there were, how much noise is a fence going to block? Or is it for the drivers' safety? An out-of-control car is going to be stopped by a fence? I don't think so.

Years ago, when "soundproof" walls went up along the highways, I remember talking with family and friends about how ugly they were, and we joked how somebody connected obviously got the contract, because many of these walls were nowhere near housing. It doesn't seem so funny now. It's sad, almost as pitiful as trying to sell the idea that a fence is going to stop terrorists.

An old twist to a new story

We've been running stories about proposed plans to replace the bridge between Highlands and Sea Bright -- both towns withdrew support for the project earlier this month, preferring repair and renovation over a new span nearly twice as high that would obstruct views. They also appear to be fond of the current bridge, which, as one resident put it, is "part of the fabric of our community, and we need to protect it."

With that in mind, along with op-eds and letters we received, I was caught by surprise when doing some research into the Press archives to find a 75-year-old story about the bridge on the front page: "SEASHORE BRIDGE'S DEADLY RECORD: Highlands Structure, Declared Most Dangerous in U.S., Soon To Be Replaced,"
Jan. 31, 1932.

It's great stuff. The article talks about the "picturesque Dick Mount," shown in a photo looking every bit the bridge captain he was for, up until that point, 45 years. "Dick Mount said aplenty when he declared, 'Why, if I was to sit down right now and try to tell you of the accidents I've seen or heard of here, I'd still be talking when 1933 rolled around.'"

Mount describes his early years there. The bridge was open to boats only from midnight to 6 a.m. But he could close it, and did so for late-night partying drivers who paid him $5 per carriage -- giving his $65-a-month salary quite a boost: "The gay boys were the lads who drove down in style to the races at Monmouth Park. They'd come back about 1 or 2 o'clock in the morning feeling fine. They'd line up on the bridge and give me a hail and then I'd tumble out, collect my $5 for each wagon and then crank the old draw shut. Sometimes there were as many as 15 or 20 carriages, fine rigs drawn by fine horses."

Mount also told of a group that all filed past after only the first paid the $5 one morning. He got them back: when they returned, he didn't answer their calls, and they had to turn around and loop back through Sea Bright to Red Bank, then back north. Said Mr. Mount: "It was a sore and sleepy crowd that straggled home that morning, but they had learned their lesson."

Apparently, a crossing railroad line made it pretty unsafe, with many cars going the wrong way or off into the drink. "The children around here had a lot of fun when an ice cream truck went overboard. They flocked into rowboats and salvaged a lot of the ice cream before the water damaged it."

The townies of 1932 were a little happier about the bridge's replacement than the locals of today, nearly 75 years later: Mayor George Hardy told the reporter in 1932, "Yes, we'll all be glad to see the bridge go. It's a relic of the dark ages."
Funny thing is, the "fabric of our community" and the "relic of the dark ages" quotes are the last lines in the 2006 and 1932 articles.

How things can change.

C'mon, it's a history lesson

I hope the Neptune Township Committee doesn't waste more time in its discussion of whether the township is allowed to provide funding toward the Black History Month celebration because its theme is "African-American Contributions to Praise and Worship."

It seems a committeewoman was concerned that allowing public money to fund anything with "worship" in the title would be stepping over the boundaries of separation of church and state. C'mon. It's not like they're espousing a particular religion, or planning services or prayer sessions. It's a lesson in history.

Do we exclude references to religion when we teach about the Crusades? Do we cut out the religious base of the Pilgrims in U.S. History class? Do we ignore the Spanish Inquisition? (Although that always reminds me more of the Mel Brooks version in "History of the World Part I.")

The committee should simply consider it part of our country's history. As in Black History Month. I think it's a perfectly appropriate theme.

Code word: expensive

When I bought my car in 2000, it came with a new security device: a coded key. Sounds great, but if you lose it, it'll cost ya. A return to the dealer for a new key will run you about $100. A locksmith can get you one for a little less than half that. Then you have to go to your auto manual to learn how to program it. But you usually need two already-programmed keys to program the third, or at least you do with mine.
So I'm down to two keys already. Third one should be somewhere in our house, but I can't be sure. It also might have found its way into the garbage via some little, well-intentioned hands. But I want a third key, to have my keys, my spares and my emergency key that's kept in a safe place.
From what I understand, the keys can prevent auto theft because every time the engine is started, if it doesn't detect the code from the key, it won't operate. I guess that means no hot-wiring, not that there's a line of people waiting to steal my minivan with the interior that's been drawn on, spilled on and covered with sand and wet beach towels.
I miss the days when I could get a spare at any store for a couple of bucks.

When do you turn to authorities for help with kids?

I was talking with a group of moms about a news brief that appeared in our paper Wednesday regarding a South Carolina mother who had sicced the police on her 12-year-old for nosing through his great-grandmother's house, finding his Christmas present (a Game Boy) and playing with it. A little extreme, we thought.

There's more to the story. The family has had a lot of problems - the boy has stolen money from his mother, he's inching toward expulsion from school, he has shoplifted, he was arrested for disorderly conduct and he punched a cop. The mother said she didn't know what else to do, and that she dreads the day she'll get a phone call saying he's been killed. It's heartbreaking. She's going to try and have him placed with the state's Department of Juvenile Justice.

I don't know all the details or family dynamics in this case. But how do parents deal with having to say they can't handle a child? It must be awful to hand over your kid to a juvenile justice system, or a boot camp. When is tough love the only, or at least the best, option?

Giants and Pirates

Thank goodness for Seton Hall b-ball. The Pirates are taking the sting out of the last few Giants losses. I don't watch a lot of sports, but I make it a point to follow those two teams. The Giants were riding high until a few weeks ago. I wore a Giants shirt last weekend during the stunning 4th quarter loss, and refused to wear it this weekend, figuring it was unlucky. I guess that wasn't the problem.
I've done things like that with Seton Hall. If they're winning but start losing after I tune in and they start losing, I think I jinxed 'em.
Each year, sports writer Tony Graham and I have the "How's the Seton Hall-Monmouth game going to go" conversation. As the season started, Tony stopped me and said, "Maybe this is the year Monmouth will beat the Hall." After the loss to Fairleigh Dickinson, I was worried.
I'm not expecting a bang-up year, but I was really surprised by the pounding they gave Monmouth last night. That, and the St. Mary's game last weekend, gives me hope that they'll hold their own against the bigger guns in the Big East. I hope so.
The next in-work rival is when the Pirates take on Princeton. Randy Bergmann is a big Princeton fan. He's also my boss. We're planning to head up to the Meadowlands for that one. I've got to recheck the schedule and see how close the game is to my salary evaluation. That may sway how loudly I cheer.

Bridge commission over troubled waters

A longtime spokesman and lobbyist for the Burlington County Bridge Commission, Robert Stears, admitted Friday that he billed the commission hundreds of thousands of dollars for work not performed, and he pleaded guilty to income tax evasion for not reporting that money.

First, I have to ask: Why does a Bridge Commission - responsible for two bridges - need a spokesman and a lobbyist? Why does the state need bridge commissions at all? Why can't whatever they do be folded into the state transportation department?

Stears submitted "overstated and inflated hours," stealing more than $300,000 from taxpayers in '97, '98 and '99, then more than $500,000 in 2000, 2001 and 2002. Even greed has inflation. He then underpaid his federal income tax by more than $100,000 in 2002 and didn't file any returns in five other years.

This only came to light when a Democratic leader in the Republican-controlled county saw the lobbyist/spokesman's work product and his contracts. His fellow commissioners and the freeholders talked about how shocked they were. C'mon. How could anybody not notice $800,000 in six years?

Of course Stears gave the now-familiar-to-New-Jerseyans claptrap speech about making a mistake: "Over the past few years, I have made some bad choices." No kidding. He faces jail time and could be fined up to $250,000. Why not the $800,000 he billed the taxpayers, plus a hefty interest rate?

Maybe I should shoot for St. Patrick's Day cards

I have to figure out when I can buckle down and do the family Christmas cards. Each year, we send out about 50 or so cards to family and friends. We do the photo cards with a picture of our kids. Nothing formal, just a photo I take when I can get all four of them together and looking in the same direction.

I've decided that "Wait, look over here and smile!" shots turn out better than the ones where I dress them up and figure out a spot for them to pose. Individually, they're good at posing. Together, it's nearly impossible. It's probably better to get them by surprise now. Laughing smiles are better than forced smiles anyway.

It's December, and every year I say I'll have this done early. Then every year, I'm rushing to get the four of them in a shot together before Christmas, then flying off to get the cards done overnight. And I'm DEFINITELY not one of those card-senders who include a long essay on how well everyone's doing. I'm pretty sure people don't want to hear how excited we are that our youngest is potty trained.

Sometimes I call it a "New Years" card, knowing it's not likely to arrive before Dec. 25. Looking at the calendar for the next few weekends, we're all over the place, often split up (except at the dinner table, but food-laden smiles are pretty nasty). I'm thinking of taking their picture Christmas morning. They'll be smiling, looking cute in their PJs, and if my house is a mess, it'll be camouflaged with wrapping paper. If the cards don't arrive by New Year's, oh well!